


Alive and well

by orphan_account



Category: Young Avengers
Genre: Gen, Grief, Major Character Death Mentioned, Other characters mentioned - Freeform, PTSD, Relationships Mentioned, Self Harm, Suicide Attempt, death mentioned, depression/mental illness
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-01-02
Updated: 2015-01-02
Packaged: 2018-03-04 22:38:15
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 3,858
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3094439
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>They had seen her. Laying on the ground gone forever. They had mourned for her, some more than others. How could she be here?</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> A work of fiction about the young avengers reacting to Cassie being alive.

**Prologue**  
Teddy sat on the roof over looking the city. The air must have been bitter cold but he didn't feel it, he just dangled his legs over the side of the building, fingers drumming on his thighs, his wings stretched out behind him. God, how good that felt, have his wings apart of him. It was natural to be in human form, he had spent his entire life around it, thinking he was one of them, it didn't take effort to pass as a human. But staying in human form, it was like tying a knot in a hose. The pressure will build and build, if it's not released, eventually it will cause problems.  
Teddy refused to shift forms around Billy though. It use to not be a big deal. It use to be normal for Teddy to be a human, or a Kree-Skrull prince around Billy. It was even normal to be Freddie Mercury, or John Lennon, or Ghandi, or Kurt Wagner, or Wolverine around Billy. But ever since... Well, Teddy has only shifted once in front of Billy since Cassie, and it didn't end well. He had been playing Call of Duty, Billy ever present on his windowsill. Occasionally murmuring ways to complete the mission to Teddy. But the third time Teddy failed the mission, he punched a pillow out of frustration, kicking up dust and causing him to sneeze. His sneeze released Hulking. Costume and all. He could feel Billy tense up, could he his breathing hitch. He changed back as quickly as possible, but it was too late, Billy was already taken prisoner by a flashback.   
Teddy was so lost in the memory of Billy's cried and trying to calm him that he didn't hear Tommy join him.  
"Meatball sub with provolone?" Tommy asked, snapping Teddy back to reality.  
"Yeah. Thanks, Tommy."  
"No problem, Theodore." Tommy said before tearing off a chunk of his sub and swallowing it nearly whole. They ate in silence for a long time, staring out at the city. The sirens and horns and lights. "How is he doing. And don't give me that 'he's alright' bullshit you fed Kate too calm her down, how is he really?" Tommy whispered, broken, scared to get the answer.  
"He won't talk anyone. Rebecca wants him to see a therapist but..." Teddy didn't know how to finish his thought, "he has awful nightmares, screams all night... The flashbacks- everything causes one. He just starts shaking and screaming and crying and goes immediately in to fight." Teddy takes a deep breath "the fucking PTSD makes the depression feel like a gift sometimes." Tommy took a shaky breath and sighed. Even if Altman's description hadn't been enough, the fact that he swore- and said 'fuck'- would have painted a picture of how awful things were.  
"Kate's stopped doing archery." Tommy blurted out. "She just stopped doing it. She threw herself back into charity. Last I heard from her she was building wells in Nigeria... Or something like that. It's what she did when her mom passed-" a bright flash of color distracted them. A couple blocks away they could see The X-Men fighting someone. The Serpent Society, maybe? Tommy had a longing look in his eyes. "Man, I want to be there." Tommy whispered.   
"You know, no one is stopping you, you can still be a hero."  
"No. Not without you guys."   
"Tommy every team needs a jerk speedster."  
"Every team has a jerk speedster."  
"What about aveng-"  
"Quicksilver."  
"X-me-"  
"Northstar."  
"...Alpha-"  
"Aurora." Tommy fired back. Teddy thought for a couple seconds. For what a massive nerd he was, he was doing poorly on superhero teams.  
"X-Factor! They don't have a jerk speedster!"  
"I am NOT working with Shatterstar." Tommy spat. Teddy recoiled, as if Tommy's words had burned them. Tommy sighed "I only want to be a jerk speedster, if I'm the young avengers jerk speedster." Tommy pug his head between his knee. "I thought you said this would have blown over in a week."  
"Well you didn't honestly expect us to just pick up and move on that quickly did you?"  
"It's been 4 months, Teddy." Tommy choked. "I thought... I don't know, I just thought after the whole statue thing. Everyone in their uniforms... I thought-"  
"Things would be normal again?" Teddy finished. Tommy nodded.  
"God, why did she have to die?" Tommy whispered, close to tears.  
"I don't know," Teddy said quietly, wrapping his arms around Tommy.  
"I wish she would just come home. That this was all some terrible dream. Or a distasteful prank."  
"Me too, Tommy, me too."


	2. Kate

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> MAJOR TRIGGER WARNING: suicide attempt plays a huge role in this chapter.

Kate  
The plane ride back from Israel was so long and boring that I couldn't even sleep. I had been helping to rebuild a synagogue, destroyed by a fire fight with Palestine. Other than the fighting and bloodshed over the land, Israel was beautiful. Man, if i could tell Billy i went to Israel-  
Correction. If i could tell the Old Billy I went to Israel, his face would light up, that dorky smile that lit the world up. He would ask me so many questions about which tribes' region had i gone to? Had i gone to Jerusalem? Did i love it there? And Billy would be excited about everything and tell tidbits from his own life. The tribe his family was apart of, what Jerusalem is like at Hanukkah when he goes and visits his grandparents.  
But Old Billy was no longer there. He'd been replaced by this new Billy.  
everyone thought things would be better after Mother and for a little while they were. Everyone would throw on their uniforms and would fight the good fight and then go out for food. But Billy always skipped out on the post battle food and sometimes skipped out on the battle itself. He would make excuses about a big test he had to study for, or being grounded, or having to babysit, anything that would keep him out of the field. We thought 'it's okay, he's just trying to ease back it' 'he'll come around, he fought Mother with us, surely he would fight *insert villain here* with us!'  
Then, Billy tried to commit suicide.  
That day had been awful (obviously). I got a call at 10pm. I had groaned and rolled over to answer the call from Teddy  
"There better be a really good reason for calling me Altman, I've got a 4am flight back to California an I'd really like to-"  
"Billy tried to kill himself." Teddy spoke. His voice so monotone and cold.  
"Oh my g- how is he? Are you at a hospital?"  
"Um... Yes? He's stable and resting, why?"  
"I'll meet you on the roof, Altman." I said hanging up. Running on rooftops is usually more enjoyable, especially when I know That Gambit is on patrol for the X-men tonight and is definitely watching me. But I feel nothing. Just my feet flying from one ledge to another, the paracore I've done thousands of times. Until I'm on the roof of St. Victor's. Teddy is there. Sitting on the edge of the roof. So I walk up and throw my arms around him. He tenses for a second, realizes it's me and relaxes. I can feel his shaky breathing. I can tell he's tearing apart, but Teddy isn't going to let me know how bad he feels. Teddy never thinks about himself that way. He is alway comforting everyone else.  
"Im here for you, Teddy." I said, kissing the top of his head.  
"I know." He whispers, his voice about to break, "He was fine when I left for the movies with Tommy and Noh..." He says shaking his head. "When I got back... He was just laying on the floor... He wasn't responding-"  
"It's okay Teddy. I don't need details." I choked out, despite the knot that had formed in my throat. Teddy silently wiped his face, and continued to take shaky breathes until his breathing was steady again.  
"Come one," Teddy said, jumping to his feet and helping me up "he'll want to see you."  
I've always hated hospitals, I had spent to much time with mom in them when she got sick. I held on to Teddy's hand as I had once held on to my father's in hall that smelled of bleach and antiseptic. We got to room 616 and Teddy stopped. "They had to pump his stomach... They have him on some sort of medication to keep him calm. He might be asleep but he's been awake a lot." He explained, I nodded to show him I understand. We both took a deep breath, and Teddy opened the door slowly. The room was dimly lit, but Billy laid in the bed, an IV in the back of his hand, a tube in a nose, and gauze wrapped around his left arm. He was only half awake. his eyes were glazed over, obviously heavily sedated. He attempted a weak smile. "Hey handsome," Teddy chuckled at him, kissing his forehead. Billy just smiled wearily.  
"What's wrong? Cat got your silver tongue?" I smiled.  
"Hurts... To talk..." Billy grunted, and winced.  
"Oh... Oh I'm sorry."  
"It's...fine... Promise."  
"Well if it hurts, Stop talking then, you idiot." I spat, why was I so mad? But Billy just smiled and laughed weakly. Even obvious how much effort it took to laugh a little bit. Instead of talking he tried to sign to me and Teddy but he was so drugged, his hands weren't operating up to snuff.  
It was hard to believe that just a few hours before he had tried to end it all.  
"Ms. Bishop?" A flight attendant said, snapping me out of the memory.  
"Uh.. Yeah?"  
"Did you hear me? I said, tray up we're about to lan in New York."  
"Uhh.. No. But, I'll be sure to do that." I replied.  
Airport security went as normal. Walking through the airport, I had a little girl recognize me.  
"Mom! That's hawkeye! Are you hawkeye? Mommy! Mommy! Look it's hawkeye!" She had squealed. I never get sick of the kids, especially the little girls who tell me that they look up to me. It's pressure being a role model, sure. But to have these little girl learning self-defense and that being a girl and shouldn't limit them? It's worth it. Her name was Narya, and we took pictures and talked for a little while. She told me she loved the Young Avengers.  
"Why haven't you guys been fighting bad guys lately." We decided to go on an undetermined hiatus as a team after Billy's attempted suicide. The pressure of being a superhero had been too much, and it felt wrong to be a team without Billy. The only really plus was that Billy was finally getting help. Taking medication, seeing a therapist, etc. he had been diagnosis ex with Persistence Depressive Disorder and OCD. He had mild PTSD, but luckily with proper medication and therapy as well as a lot of support, he wasn't triggered as often. He still had nightmares and flashbacks, but flashbacks weren't caused by superhero uniforms or code names, which at one point, had been a huge trigger.  
"Well, Narya, Wiccan is sick right now, and once he feels better, then I promise you, we'll get right back out there and we'll beat up all the mean bullies, okay?"  
"Okay." She said, she asked me if she could make Wiccan a Get Well Soon card that I could give to him. So me and her sat on the floor of the airport and colored a card that had stick figures of the young avengers on front and a "get well soon!" With a bunch of hearts and smiley faces on the inside.  
"He is really going to love this card, Narya. Thank you so much." I said.  
"Narya! Sweetie they said we could board our plane now." Her mom said, she turned to me. "Thank you so much for your time, Ms. Bishop."  
"It's my pleasure. Nothing better than spending time with kids like Narya. I don't have anywhere to be until 8 anyways." I said looking at the giant clock that said New York Time: 4:28. "Thank you for letting her spend time with a complete stranger." I chuckled. "Wiccan's going to love this card, Narya, thank you." I gave her one last hug and then headed towards the exit. My car should be here by now. While exiting I decided to check my phone.  
(3) new text messages  
(1) missed call  
(1) Voicemail  
The first text.  
"Clint Barton: I just heard about your friend Billy. Is he okay? If you or your friends need anything, just let me know, kiddo."  
God I hated when he called me 'kiddo' but his concern for Billy was sweet, and if offer was generous. To the naked eye, it would seem out of character for Clint to be this serious and thoughtful. But most people don't know about the trouble Clint goes through to keep rent in his building affordable, or what he does for lucky and Barney, or what he does for deaf/hard of hearing kids. Clint is an actual teddy bear.  
The second text.  
"Tommy Shepherd: hey there smart ass, think you could pick up some eggs and bread on the way home? I'd do it myself, but then you'd complain about how I'd "ruined the bread" and use you're big words like 'pulverized' to describe the eggs. Then you'd tell me to slow down. So are you picking up eggs and bread?"  
The third text.  
"Tommy Shepherd: sorry. That was for David obviously. Ignore that."  
The two had moved in together about a month ago. There were two peas in a pod and instead best friends and best roommates. David's steady and mild personality complimenting Tommy's fast and wild personality perfectly. They constantly joked about how they were soul mates, and about their accidentally kiss on New Year's. It was nice that at least two former young avengers were enjoying themselves. Since New Year's, me and Tommy had also rekindled our relationship. But it was a very hush topic. Only David knows really. But that's because David knows everything (pun intended.)  
Once in the car I texted them both back. Telling Clint thank you for the concern and telling Tommy to stop being such an idiot, but also that I couldn't wait to come over tonight and would David be home? Because I had something special planned ;)  
Half-way back to my house I remembered the missed call and voicemail.  
(1) missed call from....  
My heart stopped beating.  
(1) missed call from Cassie Lang.  
My palms started sweating, my vision blurring. My lungs felt like they were collapsing  
This was a sick prank, I thought.  
(1) voicemail from Cassie Lang.  
My I slammed the "Listen" button and held the phone to my ear with a shaky hand.  
"Hey, Kate! Now I'm not sure if this is still your number... But I'm home and I really need to see you. Call me wen you get this!"  
It was Cassie's voice.  
My god, she was alive.  
She said I'm home as if he had only been away to university. I begin to sob, collapsing on the door to the car in a heap.  
"Ms. Bishop? What's wrong?" Asked my driver.  
"Nothing, Walter. Everything is exactly the way it should be, now."


	3. Kate (part 2)

Kate (part 2)  
She can't possibly be alive. I had seen her broken body, I held held her cold, limp hand and cried. I had been covered in her blood, screaming trying to scrub it off me. Trying to feel clean again. I had gone to her funeral. I had tried to keep it together. My seeing her mom, seeing her step-dad, seeing Scott. All of them crying, it was hard to even feel real, let only try not to cry.  
Maybe it hadn't been real. Maybe it had just been a terrible nightmare.  
We're all going to wake up, and Cassie's alive and Pre-Depression Billy is back and we'll all get pancakes and laugh and tell Cassie about how awful the nightmare was, but she'll comfort us and tell us it was all a dream and not to worry.  
I ran into Avengers Tower, probably looking like a wild and rabid animal. I need to see her. I grabbed the hawkeye clearance tag. (Hey, they didn't specific WHICH hawkeye) and scanned it to take me to Ant-Man's floor.  
What was I even going to say to her?  
I'll figure it out when I get there.  
The door opens and my heart is pounding. She is standing there waiting for me. The blonde hair, blue eyed Cassandra Lang, Stature.  
Resurrected.   
I didn't make it out of the elevator.  
My legs were so numb, I couldn't hold myself up. I just collapsed and she ran towards me.  
"Oh my god, Kate! Are you okay?" She shouted, crumpling to her knees with me. I began to sob. I grabbed at her hair and held her close. Riding the elevator.  
"You have no idea the hell we've been through without you, Cass." I whimpered, burying my face in her shoulder, letting her hold me while I shook and sobbed. She rocked me back and forth and pet my head as I mother comforting her child would.   
Eventually I got the feeling back in my body and could finally stand. We had calmed down from our initial meet and greet.   
"I'm starving," Cassie said as we left the elevator, "let's go get something to eat while you catch me up?"  
We went downtown to a really nice Italian place that I didn't catch the name of.  
"So my dad told me you've been running with Clint Barton these days?" Cassie said, raising her eyebrows  
"Well, yeah, I WAS working with him. He couldn't have survived without me either! It was great! When the Young Avengers weren't in action, I got to bail him out of a lot of shit. I met his brother- we even got a dog!"  
"So why did it become a past tense?"  
"Couldn't take being 'Lady Hawkeye' or 'Hawkeye 2.0' anymore. Had to go do my own thing, you know?" I said, taking a mouth full of the best pasta I've had in ages.  
"So I went to L.A., I took the dog with me too. Became a private investigator. Took on Madam Masque. Helped a gay couple get there flowers back, the usual." She snorted at that and I smirked. I forgot easy it was to make Cassie laugh, I forgot had wonderful that laugh was, and how is it was to talk to Cassie. It felt like remembering how to breathe.  
"So, why are you in New York? Where's the dog? OH! CAN I MEET THE DOG?" Cassie squealed.   
"My neighbors, the couple, they're taking care of him. I'm in New York because-" I pause. What do I tell her "oh, I'm just visiting the boys." I shrug. It's not entirely a lie. I'm in New York to see if Billy's okay. For a little while after his suicide attempt about a month ago, they suggested that Billy stay in the hospital for a while. Not necessarily in the Pshy Ward, but in a division of the hospital for patients recovering from panic attacks, eating disorders, PTSD, Depression, etc. The program required individual and group therapy. His therapist at the hospital would mark his progress until she thought Billy had made enough improvement to go home. He was released from the hospital about 3 days into my trip to Israel.   
But Cassie didn't need to know how bad Billy had gotten. Just assuming that her and Jonas' death had anything to do with Billy's problem... She'd be crushed. "Have you gone to see any of the others yet?" I blurted out. I hope she hadn't seen Billy like this, if she had, wouldn't she have mentioned it by now?  
"No I have yet," she smiled "oh please don't tell them! I want to surprise them!"  
"No matter what you do, Cass, they are going to be surprised." I said. She just giggled in response. "So... Why are you- how are you back?"  
"Doctor Doom, he felt guilty about what happened, about killing me. He used the last of his magic to bring me back." She smiled. "He saved me."   
"He put you in the ground in the first place." I growled. The hearing Victor Von Doom filled my very soul with rage, to have Cassie act like she owed him her life? That she owed him anything? Kate felt like she was going to burst into flames. Cassie just looked down at her plate. With her voice filled with hesitation she asked.  
"How are the others?" Kate was taken out of her rage, almost stunned.  
"The others?"  
"Billy, Teddy, Eli, Tommy? How-how is Jonas?" She asked, suddenly urgent. My heart shattered, and apparently, my face didn't do a good job of hiding it. "What?" She asked, panicking. I grabbed her hand, hoping to comfort her before the pain even hit.  
"After... After Doom killed you, Nate wanted to take you into the time stream. He said he could take you to a doctor in the future and save you. But... Jonas... He said it that saving you would only mess with the time stream more. That even though it sucked, we'd have to let you die." I swallowed my eyes filling with tears. Cassie knew the rest in her heart, her breaking heart, but she had me keep going.   
"After Jonas said that... Nate got really pissed and he... He..." The tears slipped down my face now, and from her own face too. "Nate killed Jonas." Cassie let out a quick sob and then covered her face. Having her back was awesome, but without Jonas here? Cassie wouldn't be as happy as before.  
We cant pretend it was a nightmare. We're still in the nightmare.   
After a while we were able to make it back to Avenger's Tower. I got Cassie into her father's level. And we just sat and cried for a long time. We were watching The Princess Bride, when my phone rang.  
Calling: Tommy Shepherd  
"Hello?" I answered  
"Thank god you picked up. Where are you? You're never late? Did you get arrested? Did you-"  
"Whoa, Tommy. Slow down. What do you mean?"  
"You said you'd be here by 8."   
"Yeah?"  
"Well when you say 8, you really mean 7:30, and it's 8:30, meaning your an hour to a half hour late."   
"What?" I looked at the clock. 8:31. "Shit. I'll be right there Tommy!" I said hanging up.  
"Tommy?" Cassie said raising an eyebrow while I threw on my shoes  
"Yeah! Come with! You want to see the rest of the team right!"  
"I figured I'd go see Billy or Teddy next... Tommy never liked-"  
"Well, you're going to see Tommy next!"  
"Okay?" She said as I dragged her out to door.  
I had to put Billy off as long as possible for Cassie's sake.


End file.
